okay, this is amusing

A week or so before the operation, Evangeline and I were making a series of trips around the area to get some chores taken care of, and to let Evangeline buy Rachel a Christmas present. As is often the case, we passed the time talking, telling jokes and singing.

Evangeline is thoroughly sold on the virtues of Bugs Bunny, so it was no surprise when we started signing -- perhaps "warbling" is the better term -- the libretto from "What's Opera, Doc?", the classic Chuck Jones spoof of Wagner's "Niebelungenlied" opera, with Elmer Fudd cast as the mighty hunter with the spear and magic helmet. (Magic helmet?) You know the one.

Well, when we got to the part where Elmer Fudd realized that his true love was the rabbit he had been hunting, and he summoned all those scourges to kill Bugs, culminating in a loud summoning of "smog," Evangeline interrupted with this observation:

"Hey, Daddy, I bet he was calling on the dragon Smaug."

It's good to see that she's been paying attention.

'the hobbit' reviewed

J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit" is perhaps one of the best-written books about the advantages of having parties. Written relatively early in his days as an Oxford don, "The Hobbit" is a strongly autobiographical novel about Tolkien and his status as a party man. His reputation as a party enthusiast was so secure, in fact, that Tolkien regularly was the host to impromptu parties as other Oxford and even Cambridge professors would appear uninvited at his home with the expectation of a good meal, some beer or wine, and rousing party games.

It is such experiences that form the basis for "The Hobbit." A sedentary fellow, much like Tolkien, Bilbo Baggins finds himself the unassuming host of a party of dwarves (more established professors) and the wizard Gandalf (the president of the university).

Wooed by promises of great wealth, and strongly encouraged by Gandalf, Bilbo joins the dwarves on a quest to regain their lost ancestral gold, an action that represents Tolkien's own quest for tenure, a position that, once secured, would guarantee him employment, a place to live, social status, and ultimately a healthy retirement package.

The story follows Tolkien-as-Bilbo's journey to the heart of the Lonely Mountain, where he must confront the dragon Smaug (the experience of teaching undergraduate and graduate students) and be swept up in the dramatic Battle of Five Armies, a situation not unlike peer review.

And in the course of the story, Bilbo acquires a magical Ring that secures his reputation with the dwarves, much as Tolkien's literary and liguistic prowess, developed through education, secured his position in academia.

A thoroughly fascinating and enchanting book, "The Hobbit" will have you wishing again and again for the opportunity to attend more parties and, even more, to host them yourself.

lotr easter eggs

If you have the extended version DVD of "Fellowship of the Ring":

1) On the first DVD, scroll all the way to the bottom of the scenes menu. When you are at the last scene, "The Council of Elrond," press the down arrow key again. This will take you next to the words "New scene." If you press play, Peter Jackson will introduce an MTV spoof called "Lord of the Piercing" that depicts an alternate rendering of the Council of Elrond. It's amusing, but it's also off-color.

2) On the second DVD, go to the last screen in the scenes menu. Switch to the right hand column, where it gives you choices of scene clusters. Scroll down to the bottom of the list, then press the Down Button. An image of two towers will appear; press play, and you will get a preview of "The Two Towers." Of course, you've probably scene the movie already, but the Easter egg is still there.

'the two towers' extended DVD

I'd be waiting for the extended DVD in any event, but the news that the extended footage includes scenes that will explain the change in Faramir's characterization, has really cinched it for me.

And on a completely random side note, I wonder how the LotR movies are affecting the names people are giving their children. A few years ago, "The Matrix" led to a burst in the use of "Trinity" as a girl's name, and "Morpheus" actually had five uses in a single year, enough to put it on the list of active names. (No joke; somebody for some reason actually keeps track of the names people give their kids, probably for demographic purposes, and cuts it off at five. "Morpheus" had been unknown as a name since mythological times, and now it's back.)

We named our daughter Eowyn, but that was just because we love Tolkien's books and we picked the name nearly three years before the first movie came out. But I'm wondering now if she's more likely to run into other girls named Eowyn, with or without the diacretic, and if she's going to bump into a boy named Faramir and have to enjoy the obvious jokes. As long as his name's not Grima, I suppose ...

'the two towers' cliff-hanger

I suppose I can understand the reason for the reported move of Shelob from "The Two Towers" to "Return of the King," but I am a little disappointed. The last pages of "The Two Towers" the book is one of the all-time greatest literary cliff-hangers. The first time I read it, it was much like the same feeling I had when I heard this dialogue:

Riker: What do you mean he's with the Borg?
Worf: He is a Borg!
Picard: I am Locutus of Borg. Your lives as you have known them are over. From now on you will adapt to service us. Resistance is useless, Number One.
Riker: Mr. Worf ... fire.

TO BE CONTINUED ...

And they knew they were doing it too.

I wish Jackson would leave Shelob at the end of the second movie, but I understand why he's not. The wandering in Mordor isn't likely to be appealing enough to support a big chunk of "The Return of the King" in the cinema. But he would get a lot of Tolkien newbies rushing out to buy the books and to see his movie if he did it that way.

smeagol

It's the bitter irony of the book -- I think Smeagol *was* changing, but Sam never let him. Frodo was willing to give Smeagol the chance he needed to become a new person and redeem himself, but Sam was so deeply suspicious of him that Smeagol ended up falling back on established patterns of behavior.

In the last chapter or so before the book ended, Smeagol was all set *not* to do what he did, because he was moved with compassion for Frodo. But what does Sam do? He wakes up and says, "Where have you been sneaking off to?" and immediately the light dies out in Smeagol's eyes.

It's no surprise the old fellow attacked Sam personally.

'fellowship of the ring' DVD

We got our extended version DVD of "The Fellowship of the Ring" on sale last Saturday for $25. It even includes the free movie ticket for "The Two Towers.'

Overall, I thought it vastly superior to the cinematic release. I wasn't wild about the scene where Boromir tries to take the Ring during the Council of Elrond and I think there was another scene that was kind of weak, but I can't remember what it is right now.

Absolutely worth the money, though.

Hugo Weaving's Elrond was a badass

Have you seen Peter Jackson's "Lord of the Rings" yet, and considered how he has reinterpreted Tolkien's work. For example, Elrond.

Tolkien's Elrond was a wise and far-seeing elf who was removed from the events of Middle-earth because the time of the elves was past, and men were now coming into their own. By contrast, Hugo Weaving portrays an embittered immortal Elrond who sees humanity in decline rather than rising to take its place as the elves leave. He even seems surprised by Frodo's decision to take the Ring.

And really, who didn't see "Fellowship of the Ring" and picture the scene at Mount Doom as something like this?

Elrond. I was there the day the strength of men broke, Gandalf.

Flashback: Elrond urges Isildur to throw the Ring into Mount Doom and Isildur refuses.

Elrond. Fine. Have it your way.

He picks up Isildur and tosses him and the Ring in together.

Or, better yet, Elrond tosses Isildur in, but decides to keep the Ring, which is beautiful to his sight. "I was there when the strength of men broke, Gandalf, when they refused to give me the Ring, my preciousssss..."

One can almost imagine the eldar all jockeying to get the Ring from Isildur while resoundly denying having any interest in it. Perhaps Isildur lost the Ring when Galadriel tried to seduce him and steal it from him in his sleep ...

Peter Jackson's 'The Two Towers'

They say Peter Jackson is taking liberties with the story as he films "The Lord of the Rings."

The most recent example" In the original book of "The Two Towers," there was only one elf at the battle of Helm's Deep, one dwarf, and many humans. I've heard that the upcoming movie is going to have more elves there than just Legolas. My understanding is that Jackson increased the presence of some of the minor characters, particularly Arwen, since she's going to marry Aragorn.

I'm really not too concerned. This is Jackson's "Lord of the Rings," not Tolkien's; and in any event, if he were to follow the book religiously there wouldn't be much room for innovation, interpretation or creativity.

The same principle applies to his portrayal of Aragorn in the first movie as a man who wasn't set on becoming king of Gondor from the first, or his decision to give Glorfindel's role of rescuing Frodo from the Nazgul in "The Fellowship of the Ring" to  Arwen.

It's his retelling and reinterpretation of the characters that add something to the movie.

(I'm so generous with his Matrix-style fight between Saruman and Gandalf. That was just stupid.)

istari rank

Here's a poser for you. The Simarilion describes Olorin as the wisest of the Maiar, and certainly when you consider what happens to the other Istari by the end of the Third Age -- two Maiar lost without a trace, Radagast off playing with animals and generally uninvolved in the affairs of the intelligent races, and Saruman corrupt -- Gandalf clearly does the best job at following Eru's purpose.

That being so, why was Saruman made the head of the order, and why does Gandalf generally defer to him?

I suppose one could argue that Saruman's desire to lead the White Council was a portent of how the passage of time eventually would lead him astray into seeking temporal power as well, but then that leads me to wonder where Curunir was standing in relationship to Melkor when Eru led them in the symphony that created the universe.

A scenario that involves Curinir jockeying for power because he desires it, and Olorin being content to let someone else have it, seems to match their personalities by the end of the Third Age, but one wonders what they would have been like at the start of the age, when Eru had just sent them into the world.

am i getting cited for this?

I wrote an article on "Lord of the Rings" that was published online by Focus on the Family. At the bottom of the article was my Yahoo! spam catch-all address, where I have received about 20-odd comments on my article, from Tolkien devotees to teeny-boppers to this and that.

Yesterday, I received my first request for help on a term paper.

Here's a copy of the e-mail I sent her. (I think I might drop the university a line just to let them know to check her paper to make sure she doesn't plagiarize me. That's been done to me before, and I can't say I appreciate it much.)

Dear Dr. Learn,

Thanks for the honorific, but I assure you it's not deserved. I have a bachelor's degree in English literature from Lafayette College, but have not continued my education beyond that.

I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions regarding Tolkien and mythology in relation to Christianity. Thank you so much for your time. If you simply don't have the time, I perfectly understand.

Wellll ... I think you can understand when I say I'm a little reluctant to answer these questions at great length just now, since by your own admission you're in the process of writing a term paper on this subject, especially since I'm a professional writer and have been plagiarized before.

If you do use my thoughts remember to attribute them in your paper, even if you don't quote me directly.

1. In my research so far, I have found many Christians to be reservedly open to C.S. Lewis, but not to Tolkien. Why do you think this is?

Because Lewis' writing is blatantly Christian and allegorical, and because Lewis is known primarily in Christian circles as an apologist, and deservedly so. It was Tolkien's example and faith that eventually led Lewis to become a believer, but Tolkien "despise[d] allegory in all its forms."

You can find more about that in various biographies about Tolkien. The one I have is "J.R.R. Tolkien: Architect of Middle-earth."

2. In general Christians shun fantasy novels, and fairytale stories. One Christian told me that we as Christians don't believe in fantasy. They felt reality dealt more with Christian values. How do you feel about this statement?

I'd say they'd have to discount a large portion of the New Testament, since Jesus taught in parables. So did some of the prophets and judges.

Stories are stories, and as such they all present a window to truth; Calvary is the point at which all stories become True.

3. Tolkien once said that the Bible was the ultimate example of a myth. A true myth. Many Christians would take offence at this statement. In what way (if any) could the Bible be seen as a myth?

Tolkien was using the academic, rather than popular definition, in which "myth" refers to a story that is essentially true in an existential sense, regardless of whether it is factual. In that sense, yes, the Bible is a very mythical book. Another term used to describe this sort of mythic stature is "archetype."

4. Why don't Christian institutions/families encourage this type of genre? If you look at the media, it is everywhere, and is often the most popular median for children. Wouldn't open discussions of materials such as Harry Potter and LotR be more helpful than to have kids reading the books on their own?

Absolutely.

Many Christians fear what they don't understand, and as such they feel threatened by something as wildly popular as Harry Potter (when I was a teen the bogeyman was Dungeons & Dragons), especially since it makes use of magic as a vehicle for its storytelling.

5. Do you feel Tolkien is a predominately Christian book that is well written with obvious Christian undertones? If so, why is it so often overlooked?

"The Lord of the Rings" is a thoroughly religious book. Tolkien himself said that Gandalf and the other Istari are angels sent into the world at the start of the Third Age to battle Sauron's evil. The elvish waybread the fellowship receives in Lothlorien is representative of the Eucharist; the elvish heroine Elbereth is analagous to the Virgin Mary.

Then there's Tolkien's symbolism, such as Gandalf dying and returning to life more powerful than before and dressed in white; Aragorn having authority over illness because he is the true king, and so on.

6. Many Christians would say that Harry Potter and LotR are more related than LotR and Chronicles of Narnia. Does Harry Potter seem to express the same values as LotR?

I have no idea what J.K. Rowling believes spiritually (I am told she does not believe in magic), but her book contains many positive elements. Harry, Ron and Hermione understand the importance of friendship and loyalty; they display courage against incredible odds and risk their lives and reputations time and again to help each other and other people. Evil is punished, good is rewarded, and her imaginary world is essentially a moral one.

On top of that, if you've read the first Harry Potter book, you're aware that Harry's mother died saving him from Voldemort. The result of her sacrifice was that Voldemort's power was broken and he is unable to harm Harry. Since you go to a Seventh Day Adventist university, you should be able to see a very strong parallel to the gospel there.

tolkien's women

Tolkien's got women other than Éowyn, though you might not be able to tell that from the fans. What about Galadriel and Arwen?

Galadriel has that tremendous scene with Frodo where he offers her the Ring and we get a glimpse of how terrible and awe-inspiring she is -- and then she passes the test. She refuses the Ring and allows herself to diminish and ultimately disappear from Middle-earth along with all she rules.

And Arwen is a much bigger character than just in Lord of the Rings. Check out the appendices and the other related material. The sacrifice she makes for Aragorn is a tremendous one, and says a lot about her strength.

The movie doesn't factor into this. I couldn't think of anything Liv Tyler had been in prior to "The Fellowship of the Ring," and finally had to check on imdb.com to find out. Cate Blanchett I saw in Elizabeth, which barely gave her a chance to show her acting talent because the director did such a hackneyed job on the film that it was fairly incomprehensible.

One of the things that keyed my interest in the movie is that Peter Jackson avoided casting any "stars." Elijah Wood, Sir Ian McKellan, Viggo Mortensen and the others are all fairly well-known, but they don't have the star drawing power of someone like Brad Pitt, Michelle Pfeiffer or the others. I can name only one or two movies for several of the stars, and even fewer for none.

I like the characters for their own sake, which is why I would have been annoyed if they had cast Sandra Bullock or Jennifer Lopez as one of the elves -- it would have been an obvious attempt to cash in on someone's star status at the expense of faithful casting.

Reading 'The Hobbit': exercises in missing the point

A couple years ago I worked with a news editor who in his late 20s was reading "The Hobbit" for the first time.

His initial excitement gave way to disappointment and outright disdain by the end. He'd been reading it as an adventure novel, where Bilbo and the dwarves were off to fight a dragon. In his mind, the promised climactic battle was a cheat. Smaug had been killed with one arrow, fired by a character whose introduction 20 pages earlier had barely registered.

I tried explaining that it wasn't about the dragon, but about Bilbo's growth as a character from timid sedentary hobbit to expert burglar, adventurer and hobbit with backbone to stand up to Thorin. He still didn't get it.

It's sad that Tolkien is not only the founder of the entire fantasy genre, he's also disliked by a number of people who have grown up with the derivatives. Pretty sad, they're so used to schlock they can't understand the real thing.