Writings lost, and writing saved

I've written a lot of things online that I wish I still had access to.

There was a discussion several years ago on the About.com Christian Humor forum where I reflected on why I had left Pentecostalism. It stands out in my memory because it expressed clearly for the first time a lot of complicated thoughts I'd been having about a period of my faith that had meant a lot to me, but the post is gone.

I've been stirring in the dust of the CHRefugee forum on Delphi for the same reason. I've made some posts from time to time on that forum that contained decent ideas or original thoughts; as a result, when I have the time to kill, I'm looking for them there, cleaning them up, and then posting them here, on this blog.

Another lost item is the ten dares I had come up with for returning missionaries. Item: "Visit a Pentecostal  church. During worship, use your new language to order a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese. Sit back and await the interpretation."

That one stands out not only because it's my favorite, but because I actually did something similar to that in children's church at the Assemblies of God church I attended.

In a puppet show about the Baptism of the Holy Spirit that we were performing, one of the puppets was supposed to start speaking in tongues. Rather than mess around with that "untie my bowtie" nonsense, I said, "Mwen vle un pitsa laj avek pepewoni e ple fwomaj."

The associate pastor, who was backstage with me, started to laugh and promptly smacked me.

I made the list years ago, and I'm afraid I can't recall it entirely. The few I can:

1. Tell the board of elders what you really think about the proposed bowling alley addition to the church, the new Ford Lincoln Mercury for the pastor, or the latest frivolous additions to the sanctuary.

2. While on the missions field, send your tithe back to your home church. Designate the money for your own support.

3. Also while on the missions field: Borrow a baby and convince a friend to stand next to you for a photograph. Turn the picture into Christmas cards "from my family" and send them to all your supporters. Please note: This works even better if you were already married when you left for the missions field. (Yes, I did this one too. Some people still crack up over it, while others will brood silently.)