whom to blame for your faith?

It's an interesting question, and not one I'm sure I can qualify an answer to adequately. As I've written about elsewhere on the forum, I became a Christian in 1988 "on my own" while listening to the music of the then-controversial pop/metal band Stryper.

I received nothing of value spiritually from my parents. We attended a Presbyterian Church while I was growing up that was about as alive as the onions in my garden are right now. That taught me pretty much that God and religion were boring and to be avoided if possible.

There were Christians I had known before 1988 who had some impact on me, I'm sure. One was a customer on my paper route who although she was over 60 was one of the few friends I had as a teen. Others belonged to the high school youth group I attended while I was an afs student in Rotorua, New Zealand. That was where I first saw a living faith, primarily among the adult leaders of the youth group -- Christian Pilaar and John Thornton.

I've been influenced by the music of Keith Green. It was because of his no-nonsense example that I decided to enter the missions field after college, where I would say my faith was stretched and grew the most. Probably the most signifiacnt mentor type there was Phil Murphy, a Church of Christ missionary who made me stop to think about what following Christ means in terms of our commitment to other people and to the poor specifically. If it weren't for Phil's influence, I probably never would have become a foster father to Christian.

My college fellowship and the Assemblies of God church I belonged to for much of college and afterward, while I enjoyed them at times, had a negligible impact on my growth spiritually, I think. If anything I think their effect did more harm than good and I've had to unlearn a number of the attitudes, beliefs and habits I picked up there.

And then there's my wife. Like many people, I have some secrets that I do my best to keep for various reasons. The beauty is that Natasha knows these scerets but loves me anyway. I've learned more about love from her -- and from our children -- than I have from anyone else.